It’s Good to Gossip!

I’m sure we've all grown up being told that gossiping is a terrible thing to do. Well I am here to tell you that is in fact not the case. Shock horror, it was just a case of men fearing the power of women's chatter that painted gossip as a sin. Before gossip was seen as a noxious thing it was viewed as an important tool for sharing information and keeping each other up to date. The word actually comes from old English, ‘godsibb’ which literally means god's relative. Over time the term became associated with female friends and then people talking idly. 

If you gossip you are now seen as insecure, jealous, angry at the world, unhappy with your life and well sometimes a bitch! In earlier times, gossiping served as a vital tool for women to connect, share news, and maintain social bonds. It was a way to express emotions, exchange information and ultimately strengthen social ties. Interestingly, gossiping also has psychological benefits, triggering the release of oxytocin, a hormone associated with positive emotions and social bonding. Gossiping can bring friends closer together on a chemical level!

So how and why did the term ‘gossip’ become so negative? During the middle ages, sociality amongst women prevailed. Most activities were done collectively and a tight knit community emerged. In the sixteenth century the industrialisation of mass enterprises gave rise to a system in which accumulates capital hence the the emergence of capitalism. Women started to be excluded from society and friendships amongst women became an object of suspicion. Women were portrayed as too domineering of their husbands or even Witches! Laws were made against women who gossiped or held meetings at home or in public. Women were told to stay quiet and remain calm else they would be punished. Not to worry the Church stepped in to help…the men of course. The Church enforced obedience with a device called, ‘scolds bride’ it was used to physically silence women, this device was mostly used upon the request of husbands. It inflicted not just physical pain but also psychological trauma, all in the name of maintaining control.

What happened when men gossiped? You see when men gossipped it was viewed very differently, it was due to important reasons of course and mostly done in private. A study at the university of California found that most people view gossiping as, ‘immoral, uneducated, typically female and of a lower social class.’ This study also found by using recording devices that men gossip just as much as women. Unfortunately because of our society women receive much more shame and disapproval for gossiping than men. 

Only 3-4% of gossiping has been proven to be malicious. Honestly people just want to connect, talk and share. Research suggests that we spend on average 52 minutes per day talking to someone about someone else. So next time you spend an hour dissecting with your bestie about why Brad and Jane broke up don't feel bad. You're simply contributing to the rich tradition of women connecting, sharing, and supporting each other. 

Kaysey Redcliffe, Events Coordinator and Content Creator at Partridge Lakes Cafe & Events